After just having released her 2nd EP, Irish Songwriter Etaoin doesn't slow down but keeps releasing her delicate tales of heartbreak and loss. This time, she has an apology to make: "I think the songs that say sorry are always the hardest to sing, because when you hurt someone you care about you never really stop being sorry. It’s 4 years on and I’m still to this day so sorry."
Etaoin deals with that in the most Etaoin way: by writing a brutal folk jewel. With just her acoustic guitar and her choking voice, she is ready to make her listeners feel every bit of regret she has. "After my first heartbreak I made a pact with myself to never let myself care that much about anyone ever again, but then I met this boy from Ireland. We used to drive through the Irish countryside and walk the beaches and talk for hours in his car, it was literally like shit straight out of a Hannah Montana movie," says Etaoin and you might get a suspicion where this is going. "He was so patient and kind and everything I should have needed, but I was so hurt and scarred that I was too scared to trust any boy and I didn’t want to commit. This caused a lot of issues and nine months in we called it quits. I realised after it all went down that I really put him through hell by pushing him away and acting like I didn’t care all the time.
You can tell that this song is especially close to Etaoin's heart, that's why she choose this track for her first ever music video. "The idea behind the video was really zooming in on that line 'I know damn well I broke him', and telling a real story from that. It eludes to a car crash or some sort of 'breaking' of a person. It’s a metaphor of me observing the mess I made by being not able to commit and the emotional turbulence of the situation. It’s brutal. Just like the song."